Category: Hiking

Disillusionment, Rant
2018.05.29
Hiking, Latergram
High on Friday morning, using Whitney’s Trail Crest (13,612′) as just… a mountain pass. A way into the Sierra. I wonder now, who does that? If you’re 1.9 miles and only 800 vertical feet from summiting the tallest peak in the lower 48, having those bragging rights and that chest-filling view, why just cross over and run down the other side of the mountain? Why does the chicken cross the road? 21 miles later that day (2 extra, futile miles trying to distance myself from a very large bear), I wondered why even thru hike? And just like that, my entire outlook changed, and my summer plans jackknifed. I think I’m leaving thru-hiking for backpacking. Because they ARE different, and I suspect thru-hiking as a sport has […]

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Gotta Outnumber Rotten Folks
2018.05.01
Hiking, Pacific Crest Trail
OK so a little rant about the “sexual harrassment” on the trail. Believe it or not I was at one point relieved at how different things were on the Pacific Crest Trail compared to the Portland Oregon cycling circle jerky community I had come from. In the bike community I tried to have a little half-dressed fun cheering cycling races which I was also RACING IN, and then got called all sorts of names by strangers AND friends. “Whore,” “slut,” “butterface,” “anti-feminist.” OMG. Next thing I knew, after I’d been beaten down into silence, it was a huge trend to cheer races like that. Ahead of my time, I guess. What folks didn’t know is I came from a childhood of grade school bullying about my body, […]

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Tiger’s got stripes
2018.04.15
Hiking, Latergram
I want to be back there badly but it’s sorta a dumb idea still… So I purposely took less than enough gear up today so I’d be forced to turn back. Been working my ass off since Feb 24 trying to recover from the huge loss of STUFF in the Grand Canyon, plus get ready for Uncle Sam. The other day I couldn’t find my bikini and when I realized it’s also in the Colorado River I almost cried. I thought the list of things I lost was done, so that struck me. Yesterday I looked for my Western style button-down and realized…it’s in the River. Yep. Oh well. It’s still surprising though HOW MUCH Iost. I’m almost back on top and looking forward to being back […]

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Colorado River: 1, Me: 0
2018.03.05
Hayduke
It was funny that just as I got back to Flagstaff after a 20-day float of the Colorado River, and was scrambling to get home after having lost my iPhone and wallet in the River, that I discovered I was chosen to write for the Listserve. The Listserve is your chance to write an email to a million people. I’ve been a member of the Listserve for several years, and while frankly I don’t read all the emails, the ones I do read are charming and provide perspective for the day. I wondered when I would be chosen, but really I wondered if I’d already been chosen and missed my “You’ve won the Listserve!” email. I almost missed the “You’ve won the Listserve!” email. With 72 hours […]

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Colorado River Trip Out
2018.02.28
Hayduke, Latergram
Sometimes when I tell people my stories I fear they think I’m lying. But I don’t need to lie, it’s just chronic bonkers over here. Feb 23 I got off the Colorado River after a 20-day float. It’s taken a couple days to get home and I still don’t have my feet under me BECAUSE (here’s where it gets good)… On the first night out (incidentally at Lower Jackass beach) I lost my tent, beloved handmade down sleeping bag, Thermarest Neoair, iPhone, wallet, all of my casual clothes, and about $500 more worth of gear to the River in a sudden wind storm. I was seconds late to my tent, only to find stakes still in the ground and the tent floating, pitched perfectly, down the middle […]

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GSENM
2017.12.05
Hayduke, Latergram
I knew the “president” would reverse the National Monuments so I’m not surprised. But I still feel like I’ve been punched. I’ve spent a little time walking in both the monuments he decimated, mostly GSENM (about 2-3 weeks total, living out of a backpack). I’ve grown to see why the lands were protected and why so many locals protest. 50-mile Mountain (second picture) sits atop one of the largest remaining coal deposits in the world. As you climb around it you will find gorgeous black coal just squeezing out of the ground. You also find many long roads not on the map – built illegally by prospectors. In 1994 before Clinton signed GSENM into federal protection, a Dutch coal mining company (Andalex) was trying to figure out […]

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How to Avoid the Crypto on the Arches Slickrock Route
2017.11.29
Hayduke
Nic Barth has published some fairly loose GPS tracks for his “alternates” or shortcuts on the Hayduke. Some of them might be worth looking into. Myself having hiked the route back and forth more than twice, I frankly don’t think you’ll be missing out if you ignore Barth’s KMZ/GPS input entirely. If you want to miss out, his alts are in fact generous shortcuts. Barth’s “Arches Slickrock” route is popular. I see scenic advantages to both the Slickrock route and the official Hayduke route. Unfortunately publishing the “Slickrock” route opened the door for significant negative environmental impact. Some people have tried to tell me they have hiked it without killing cryptobiotic soil but they are 101% full of shit. There is no way to hike this route […]

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Hayduke Trail Tips
2017.11.28
Hayduke, Hiking
(updated fall 2019, fall 2020, winter 20/21, spring 2022, spring 2023, summer 2024, winter 2025) These are organized section by section, east to west. I’ll probably add a few more things as they pop into my head, but these are the ones that stood out today. All things that weren’t obvious to me at first… Please do not cairn this route unless you are very lost and have no other way of back-tracking. Some folks seem to think they’re smarter than other hikers, sorta like they’re the only one who “gets it,” and the only one who has found the “correct way.” Great, fine, but do not leave permanent record of your supremacy (you may later cringe to discover you were wrong). Only remove cairns when you […]

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Heart-shaped
2017.11.17
Hayduke, Hiking, Latergram
I found this heart-shaped “pothole” in Courthouse Wash in Arches NP yesterday morning just after I found out a ride home to the Eastern Sierra had been arranged for me (thanks to Donna Saufley and @kellybelly_jellybean). My heart almost exploded with gratitude. Especially now, a day later when my body has realized the hike is over and it can let go. My stomach is inside out again with the gastritis thing and the cracks in my feet started to freakin’ bleed. Walking is not on the table today, even tho it’s “national take a hike day.” Oh, the irony. Things held together long enough for me to complete my hiking goals. It’s uncanny. And I’m thankful! So thankful. I wrote up a list of thank yous and […]

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Scarecrow
2017.11.16
Hayduke, Hiking, Latergram
I was given a Haypuke trail name last month and it is “Scarecrow.” At first I had no idea why a stranger would greet me, “Good morning, Scarecrow!” I thought it was some sort of slang I’d never heard before, and thought of calling her a name. But really, looking at myself and my hiking getup, I now find it hilarious. Later on trail I found an antique Old Crow liquor bottle with its cap intact near what appeared to be an old boys’ shooting range. It had a crow cast in the glass. I carried it for about 40 miles until I met Gary and Jeanine from Teasdale who admitted they were in the process of getting rid of things but knew someone who would love […]

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Jasper Arrowhead
2017.11.12
Hayduke, Latergram
Curtis, a sparkly blue-eyed babe I met in the middle of nowhere in the other day, kindly taught me how to find arrowheads. He gave really practical tips that made so much sense! Last night I thought I’d give it a try. Right away I found something that looked like it might be an arrowhead, maybe, but I really wanted to see a real one. So this morning I set my intentions high, making sure to be specific on what I was asking for. I stopped after walking an hour or so to take off my thermals (is this like a stupid cold, short ass day time of year to be thru hiking or what?) and filter some water. I looked around for an arrowhead. All done, […]

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1955 Mining Claim
2017.11.10
Hayduke, Latergram
A mining claim from 1955 found on the Red Benches (Utah) on Sunday Afternoon. It was damp but folded neatly inside that neat old tobacco tin. I put it back. Wonder how that claim holds these days… Nearby I found a petrified tree trunk, its core filled with crystals. I’m gonna bore you a bit with this but I got some good ones coming trust me. It’s just that to post anything or contact my mom, I have to climb the highest thing around to get data signal. You should see the sunset over Needles right now holy shit.

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Ruin Find
Hayduke, Latergram
Finally it happened to me. I hear of people who can’t help but trip over arrowheads and potsherds. Yesterday I looked down and they were everywhere. I picked my favorites, took a picture, and put them back where they can sit another several hundred years being ignored. 😍 Oh, and I’m still alive. I did some low mile days thru Dark Canyon Wilderness into Bears Ears National Monument (is it still Bears Ears? I spent the morning following tracks of a bear and cub) and am savoring the lack of momentum. An excellent aspect of going slower is finding treasures like this. That’s hard to do on a thru-hike. Anyway, I’ll be done hiking in about a week. 😬 Not sorry about the ear bug. “If you […]

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Ruins You Probably Won’t Get To
2017.11.08
Hayduke, Latergram
These are some pretty remote ruins for most people, and so despite not having protection, they’re in pretty okay shape. Looking closely at the adobe, there are small rocks pressed into it to create patterns/designs. This T-shape door is something you’d see more of closer to Monument Valley, but here we are closer to Canyonlands. This structure was built inside an amphitheatre/cave which had a small spring in the back. The view of the valley below was expansive — not only beautiful but affording good warning of oncoming strangers. Below the cave I found the town “dump” which included a ton of painted and textured potsherds. I descended to the dry creekbed nearby to camp for the night, and ascended again in the morning to take another […]

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Near Henry Meat-free (opinion)
2017.11.01
Hayduke, Latergram
Dear waitress who lectured me about how cattle ranching on public land is good for the land, how grazing fees are unfair, and how if we knew our history we wouldn’t be tearing down statues: I was wearing my SMITHS tee shirt the whole time you yacked at me. And across your state, which in my humble opinion as someone who has hiked across the land ranchers probably assume nobody sees, has been destroyed by cattle. I ate your burger to fit in and be polite and gagged down as much of that milkshake as I could while you yacked so I could excuse myself, but I’ll probably puke it up in a black pile later. I feel like a traitor for eating that after what I’ve […]

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